THE WEEKEND IS SO CLOSE YOU CAN ALMOST SMELL IT…BRING IT ON, BABY….
your daily blog is sponsored by DISCOUNT VAC AND DAKOTA HOT TUBS, BOTH IN ABERDEEN…
1. today we are saluting a SUPER HOTTIE….RAQUEL WELCH…i think that this beauty has found the fountain of youth….RAQUEL is 70 years old, and is by far, the hottest 70 year old that i know…here she is back in her younger days…
and here is the incredibly beautiful RAQUEL WELCH today at the age of 70…can’t beleive that!!!
2. in our “WHATEVER HAPPENED TO” segment, we feature ‘THE SKIPPER’ from “GILLIGAN’S ISLAND.” of course, we are taking about ALAN HALE, JR…..his dad, ALAN HALE was also a very popular actor….ALAN HALE, JR. is one of those stars that didn’t gripe about being “typcast” in a roll. he embraced that, and wore his skipper’s hat whenever he met the fans….here is ALAN HALE, JR. back on the show….
do you know what the SKIPPER’S real name was on the show? JONAS GRUMBY….
after appearing in many other shows as “THE SKIPPER” ALAN HALE JR. died in LOS ANGELES at the age of 68 due to thyroid cancer….he was cremated and his ashes were scattered at sea….an appropriate sendoff for “THE SKIPPER.”
here is ALAN HALE, JR. in his later years….still wearing the cap..
3. YOUR CLASSIC COMMERCIAL FOR TODAY:
that stupid dog never did catch the CHUCKWAGON…here’s one from 1970 that you will remember…
4. HAPPY ST. PATRICK’S DAY EVERYBODY…well, being 100 percent norwegian, i don’t know much about this day, except that you’re supposed to wear green…..and i’m wearing the ONLY green shirt i have in my collection….by the way, years ago i intentionally didn’t wear green, because then people had to PINCH YOU……and i enjoyed it…ha ha
5. i gauge my hotel stays, among other things, by the shower….if the shower is wimpy and doesn’t distribute much water, then the stay sucks….my favorite shower ever? MY CURRENT BASEMENT SHOWER…it distributes great water pressure, and i actually feel like i’m in a shower when i’m in there…my wife and i have big differences about changing the shower head….she says that it uses to much water, and i told her that’s what i want….the saga continues….
6. GREEN EGGS AND HAM? no thanks….back when we lived in VEBLEN, my parents ran a restraunt, and one year we were playing the WAUBAY DRAGONS on homecoming, and we served up GREEN PEANUT BUTTER SANDWICHES….didn’t eat those either….green was WAUBAY’S colors, but NOT the color of peanut butter…
7. the CDC announced that the U.S. life expectancy has reached an all time high of 78 years and two months….bookkeepers for SOCIAL SECURITY replied, “DAMMIT.”
8. for the first time ever, more people are geting their newspaper news online instead of having the paper delivered…the only downside? it’s a lot more expensive to housebreak a puppy on your computer…
9. the WHITE HOUSE wants to toughen copyright laws to make it illegal to stream audio or video…they want to make it a federal felony…it will take effect as soon as they build enough prisons to hold 300 MILLION PEOPLE…
10. a DALLAS ad agency has created a sign for TERMINEX that’s made of clear plastic letters that are filled with thousands of live cockroaches….sorry, when i see that it makes me think that TERMINEX isn’t doing a very good job….
11. CHARLIE SHEEN is taking his one man performance to more venues….he realized he had to step it up a bit since JAPAN took over as the top ranked disaster…
12. JUSTIN BIEBER has met his wax figure at MADAME TUSSAUDS in LONDON…to give JUSTIN the best look, officials melted down wax figures of DAVID CASSIDY, BOBBY SHERMAN AND DONNY OSMOND…ha ha
13. JOKES OF THE DAY:
(love this first one)
Three old women are talking about their aches, pains and bodily dysfunctions.
One seventy-five year old woman says, “I have this problem. I wake up every morning at seven and it takes me twenty minutes to pee.”
An eighty year old woman says, “My case is worse. I wake up at eight and sit there and grunt and groan for a half hour before I finally have a bowel movement.”
The ninety year old woman says, “At seven I pee like a horse, at eight poop like a cow.”
“So what’s your problem?” asked the others.
“I don’t wake up till nine!”
OKAY, HOW ‘BOUT THIS ….
A blonde walks by a travel agency and notices a sign in the window, “Cruise Special — $99!”.
She goes inside, lays her money on the counter and says, “I’d like the $99 cruise special, please.”
The agent grabs her, drags her into the back room, ties her to a large inner tube, then drags her out the back door and downhill to the river, where he pushes her in and sends her floating.
A second blonde comes by a few minutes later, sees the sign, goes inside, lays her money on the counter, and asks for the $99 special. She too is tied to an inner tube and sent floating down the river. Drifting into stronger current, she eventually catches up with the first blonde.
They float side by side for a while before the first blonde asks, “Do they serve refreshments on this cruise?
The second blonde replies, “They didn’t last year.”
HAPPY THURSDAY EVERBODY…ENJOY YOUR DAY AND THANKS FOR READING MY BLOG!!