random thoughts for wednesday october 19th, 2011

OH, C’MON…IT’S NOT THAT BAD….

 

YOUR WEDNESDAY FUNNIES!!!

THIS ACTUALLY APPEARED IN A NEWSPAPER….WOW…

 

1.  happy birthday wishes are going out today to former “first child” AMY CARTER…she is the daughter of former PRESIDENT JIMMY CARTER, and his wife ROSALYNN…AMY turns 44 today…everybody remembers her….

here’s a current picture of AMY CARTER on her wedding day recently….

 

2.  does anybody remember the “embarrassment” of the CARTER years in the WHITE HOUSE?  it was JIMMY CARTER’S brother, JIMMY CARTER….he was kind of a goofball, who ended up making his own beer, “BILLY BEER.”  here he is….

the “class” of the CARTER presidential years was his mother LILLIAN….she was wonderful…

BILLY CARTER died in 1988 at the age of 51…LILLIAN CARTER died in 1983 at the age of 85……

3.  today we are going to find out whatever happened to singer GORDON LIGHTFOOT….he is definetly one of my favorite singers, and i LOVE a bunch of his music….

here are a couple of GORDON LIGHTFOOT’S famous album covers from the 70’s…..

GORDON LIGHTFOOT is still out there performing, but we almost lost him back in 2002…he was onstage, and when he was done he complained of stomach pain…turns out it was a ruptured abdominal aortic aneurysm.  he had four major surgeries, and was in the hospital for more than three months.

nowdays, GORDON LIGHTFOOT is back on tour….I had the distinct honor of meeting him in SIOUX FALLS a couple of years back…here is GORDON LIGHTFOOT, yours truly, and radio legend DENNY PITMAN…..my brother TROY is shy…he’s hanging out in the background….

 

4.  when JEANNIE AND I were at BUFFALO BILL CODY’S home in NORTH PLATTE, NEBRASKA the other day, we learned a bit of trivia that we didn’t know….did you know that many years ago, there were between 25-35 million buffalo roaming the land in our country?  yep….they were thinned down to around 350 years later…..the number is up today, but not NEAR as what it was years ago…AMAZING…..

5.  last night while feeling under the weather, i was lying on the couch watching tv….a two hour show came on that talked indepth about the movie “SILENCE OF THE LAMBS.”  it was superb…i love watching documentaries on movies like that…..after that, there was a two hour show on “FATAL ATRACTION”, but i missed that because i took nyquil and was completely zoned out…..

6.  i did sleep most of the afternoon yesterday, but during the times i woke up i found out one thing….AFTERNOON TV SUCKS….wow…there is nothing on that’s really worth watching….i had to resort to re-runs of CRAIG FERGUSON’S late night tv show….which i LOVE, by the way….

7.  VICE PRESIDENT JOE BIDEN said that AMERICANS have to spend more money on education because our students are “the kite strings that lift our national ambitions aloft.”  hmm…up until now i didn’t realize that it was the STRINGS that got the kites off the ground……

8.  retail sales were up in september…that’s the good news…the bad news is that sales were up because everybody was buying HALLMARK  “sorry you got laid off” cards….

9.  a competitor at the “world scrabble championships” demanded his opponent be strip searched after the disappearance of the letter “G.”  the letter “G” was later found sponsoring an episode of SESAME STREET.

10.  in TORONTO, a 100 year old man became the first centurion ever to run a full marathon….i think i could run a marathon when i’m 100…but i would have to get started right now…

11.  EMINEM, KEITH RICHARDS, AND LIL’ WAYNE appear on the cover of the new issue of “G.Q.” magazine, named as the “GODS OF ROCK.”  of course, when you’re talking about KEITH RICHARDS, the word “ROCK” refers to his LIVER….

12.  over seven million people tuned in for the second season of AMC’S “THE WALKING DEAD”, which is a drama about zombies….another two million people tried to watch the show but eventually found out they were watching the republican presidential debate….

13.  JOKE OF THE DAY:

     An American man, a Russian man, and an African man were all up in a hot-air balloon together. After a few minutes, the Russian man put his hand down through the clouds.
    “Aaah!” he said. “We’re right over my homeland.”
     “How can you tell?” asked the American.
     “I can feel the cold air,” he replied.
     A few hours later the African man put his hand through the clouds. “Aah we’re right over my homeland,” he said.
     “How do you know that?” asked the Russian.
     “I can feel the heat of the desert.”
     Several more hours later the American put his hand through the clouds. “Aah, we’re right over New York.”
     The Russian and the African were amazed. “How do you know that?” they exclaimed.
     The American pulled his hand up. “My watch is missing.”

HAVE AN AWESOME WEDNESDAY EVERYBODY…

JAY DEAN

 

random thoughts for tuesday october 18th, 2011

MAKE UP YOUR MIND…WHICH DAY DO YOU HATE?

 

YOUR TUESDAY FUNNIES!!!

 

1.  legendary rock-n-roller CHUCK BERRY is turning 85 today….here’s an early photo of him…

as far as i know, CHUCK BERRY is still performing today…and still a guitar whiz…..here he is recently….

 

2.  how about some CHUCK BERRY music to listen to?  man, these are classics…

here’s “JOHNNY B. GOODE.”

http://youtu.be/lNeEb7I3bwI

this was a fun little novelty song…it’s “MY DING-A-LING.”

http://youtu.be/UaEC-lWSlmI

 

3.  so, the debate rages on….MARY ANN OR GINGER on “GILLIGAN’S ISLAND?”  easy…it’s MARY ANN for me….GINGER was too “HOLLYWOOD” and “stuffy”….MARY ANN was the girl next door that you could bring home to your parents…

she was played by actress DAWN WELLS, who turns 73 today….here’s that little hottie back in the 60’s….

DAWN WELLS was in ABERDEEN a few years back, and i had the chance to meet her…she’s a lovely woman…here’s DAWN WELLS today at 73….

 

4.  and finally, “JOANIE” from “HAPPY DAYS” is celebrating a birthday…it’s ERIN MORAN’S 51st birthday today…..remember her?

here she is on the show, and with SCOTT BAIO…..he played “CHACHI”….

and here’s ERIN MORAN today at 51…..

 

5.  i hate this feeling…i can tell i’m coming down with something….not super sick right now, but can feel it moving in…man, i hope it bypasses me…way too much going on to be sick….

6.  wow…that highway stretch between MISSION and INTERSTATE 90 is boring as heck…..there’s nothing to look at, and it’s hard to pass because of all the hills and such…..that was probably the longest stretch going to NORTH PLATTE this past weekend….

7.  ARE YOU READY TO BUILD A GINGERBREAD HOUSE?

i will be building a gingerbread house for the DACOTAH PRAIRIE MUSEUM, and i challenge you to do so, too……your gingerbread house will be on display at the museum during the holidays…so, get going…we have to have our gingerbread houses ready by november first…

8.  BILL CLINTON said that he thought he was going to have a heart attack when LADY GAGA performed at his 65th birthday…..the same kind of heart attack that he suffered when HILLARY found an intern under his desk…

9.  ASHTON KUTCHER apparently left his and DEMI MOORE’S house after a moving truck was in their driveway….how ironic and funny would it be if CHARLIE SHEEN moved in?

10.  actor ZACHARY QUINTO, who played “SPOCK” in the last STAR TREK movie has declared that he is gay….first SULU came out…now the new SPOCK…no wonder everyone was fighting to go down in the ENTERPRISE’S steam room….

11.  LINDSAY LOHAN has been ordered back into court today to face accusations of parole violations that could send her to prison for up to a year and a half…or in HOLLYWOOD celebrity time, 12 minutes….

12.  reaction continues to the “OCCUPY WALL STREET” movement spreading to different parts of the country…..it even spread to NEW JERSEY with protestors camped out…..then they realized it was just the cast of “JERSEY SHORE” passed out on the sidewalks again…

13.  the rock band “KISS” has thier first ever cruise ship concert the other day…in related news, the tv show “THE WALKING DEAD” was on tv sunday night…

14.  JOKE OF THE DAY:

An Indian walks into a cafe with a shotgun in one hand pulling a male buffalo with the other.
    He says to the waiter, “Want coffee.”
    The waiter says, “Sure, Chief. Coming right up.”
    He gets the Indian a tall mug of coffee.
    The Indian drinks the coffee down in one gulp, turns and blasts the buffalo with the shotgun, causing parts of the animal to splatter everywhere and then just walks out.
    The next morning the Indian returns. He has his shotgun in one hand, pulling another male buffalo with the other. He walks up to the counter and says to the waiter, “Want coffee.”
    The waiter says “Whoa, Tonto! We’re still cleaning up your mess from yesterday. What was all that about, anyway?”
    The Indian smiles and proudly says, “Training for position in United States Congress: Come in, drink coffee, shoot the bull, leave mess for others to clean up, disappear for rest of day.”

HAVE A GREAT TUESDAY EVERYBODY…

JAY DEAN

 

random thoughts for monday october 17th, 2011

HAPPY MONDAY EVERYBODY…HOPE YOUR WEEKEND WAS BETTER THAN THIS GUYS…

 

HERE COME YOUR MONDAY FUNNIES!!!

 

1.  happy birthday wishes today are going out to actress MARGOT KIDDER…she turns 63 today….you probably best remember her as LOIS LANE, opposite CHRISTOPHER REEVES in the 1978 movie “SUPERMAN”….

MARGOT KIDDER is also known for movies like “THE GREAT WALDO PEPPER” with ROBERT REDFORD, and the cult classic 1973 movie “SISTERS.”

here is MARGOT KIDDER today on her 63rd birthday…

 

2.  today we will find out whatever happened to actress BARBARA HERSHEY….she was, and is, a very beautiful actress, who appeared in such movies as “BEACHES” with JOHN HEARD and BETTE MIDLER…

she also was in a horror movie that TERRIFIED me called “THE ENTITY.”

 

BARBARA HERSHEY also appeared in movies like “HANNAH AND HER SISTERS, “BLACK SWAN”, and she was nominated for a GOLDEN GLOBE for her portrayal as MARY MAGDALENE in the MARTIN SCORSESE movie “THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST.”

BARBARA HERSHEY is now 63 years old, and appears to get more beautiful with age….

 

3.  speaking of scary movies, last night while watching tv, a movie trailer came on for the movie “PARANORMAL ACTIVITY 3”, which comes out this friday….IT WAS TERRIFYING…i don’t know if a movie trailer has ever given me goose bumps before….here’s the movie poster…

****HERE IS THE MOVIE TRAILER…

****WARNING…DO NOT WATCH IT IF YOU ARE EASILY SCARED!!

http://youtu.be/Xl0FyyIta8E

YIKES…by the way, JEANNIE told me i will be going to see this movie ALONE…ha ha…

4.  okay…now on to our trip this weekend to NORTH PLATTE, NEBRASKA…the reason that we were down there, was that i had the honor of officiating a wedding…CONGRATULATIONS MIKE AND AMANDA…..

while we were there, JEANNIE AND I did some sightseeing, including seeing the home of BUFFALO BILL CODY…

it was pretty cool….i love history, so i love visiting sites like this…

5.  another fun thing that we did, that we have NEVER done before, was go into a corn maze….this was the actual design of the corn maze…

JEANNIE AND I had about an hour and a half to get thru it before we had to get ready for the wedding…WE DIDN’T MAKE IT…ha ha…we had to cheat to get out so we didn’t miss the wedding…we walked around for an hour, and kept ending up at the same place…frustrating, but fun…..we then headed out the entrance that we came in….

how would this be for fun?  this corn maze in NORTH PLATTE is having a HALLOWEEN fun week, as they will give you flashlights to go thru the maze AT NIGHT, plus they will have spooky characters chasing you around there….THAT WOULD BE AWESOME….

6.  IS NEBRASKA THE WINDMILL CAPITAL OF THE WORLD?  wow…i can’t believe i missed all the windmills when i went to COLORADO….JEANNIE AND I saw windmills, at least every tenth of a mile all the way from NORTH PLATTE to the SOUTH DAKOTA border….and they were the “old time” ones, too…

we couldn’t believe the number of windmills….so we silently pointed them out as we spotted them…by the way, an area in THE NETHERLANDS is supposedly the windmill capital of the world….

7.  we saw a couple of things that we have never seen in person before….while at BUFFALO BILL’S house, we spotted a PRAYING MANTIS…

up until that moment, the only one we had seen before was on “SPACE GHOST.”

we also saw a dead porcupine on the highway…we had never seen one outside of a zoo before…

 

8.  there was a tragedy on the INDY car circuit yesterday….there was an awful crash that ended up taking the life of DAN WHELDON…

makes you stop and think about the dangers of this sport….

9.  oh, and one more thing….in football news…….

NUFF SAID….

10.  a group of U.S. postal workers posed for a pinup calendar to raise money for the post office…..actually, the semi-nude postal workers look pretty good…if you don’t focus on all of the dog bites…

11.  MEN’S HEALTH magazine released it’s list of the TEN luckiest cities in AMERICA…they based the research on lottery winners, lightning strikes, and wherever DR. CONRAD MURRAY isn’t practicing….

12.  the UNITED NATIONS said that the world population will reach SEVEN BILLION very soon….see?  that’s what you get when so many NBA players have so much free time!!!

13.  on saturday, “OCCUPY WALL STREET” protestors went global in numerous major cities around the world….in NEW YORK CITY, they ended up outside of MADONNA’S apartment…and out of courtesy to her, renamed the movement “OPERATION EASY STREET.”

14.  according to a new report, more teenage boys are using “protection” during sex…hmm… more great news for DEMI MOORE…

15.  remember HAROLD CAMPING?  he was the guy who predicted that the world would end on may 21st….he’s now saying that our final day on this earth is october 21st….he decided on this date after he put fresh batteries in his “doomsday clock.”

16.  JOKE OF THE DAY:

It was opening night at the Orpheum and the Claude the Amazing Hypnotist was topping the bill. People came from miles around to see the famed hypnotist do his stuff. As Claude took to the stage, he announced, “Unlike most stage hypnotists who invite two or three people up onto the stage to be put into a trance, I intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience.”
    The excitement was almost electric as Claude withdrew a beautiful antique pocket watch from his coat. “I want you each to keep your eye on this antique watch. It’s a very special watch. Its been in my family for six generations.”
    He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, “Watch the watch, watch the watch, watch the watch…. “
    The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the swaying watch, until suddenly it slipped from the hypnotist’s fingers and fell to the floor, breaking into a hundred pieces.
    “Crap!” said the hypnotist.
    It took three weeks to clean up the theater.

 

HAVE A GREAT MONDAY EVERYBODY!!!

JAY DEAN

 

random thoughts for thursday october 13th, 2011

ALRIGHT GANG, THIS WILL BE THE LAST BLOG FOR THIS WEEK…I WILL BE OFF TOMORROW……SO, LET’S MAKE THE BEST OF IT WITH SOME GREAT THURSDAY FUNNIES…..

1.  it blows my mind watching our entertainment heroes turn older…today we have another milestone…PAUL SIMON, of “SIMON AND GARFUNKEL” fame, turns 70 today…yep, SEVENTY….here he is in the early years, and one with ART GARFUNKEL, his duet partner….

PAUL SIMON has been on SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE numerous times, and is still out on the road performing…here’s PAUL SIMON today at 70…………….

 

2.  we need to honor PAUL SIMON with a couple of videos….

first of all, here is, by far, my favorite SIMON AND GARFUNKEL song….here’s “BRIDGE OVER TROUBLED WATER.”

http://youtu.be/UVDg8fVC4EQ

here’s another great SIMON AND GARFUNKEL song…”THE BOXER.”

http://youtu.be/ky57Jo3-BaU

and we should do a PAUL SIMON original…here’s a great video with his great friend CHEVY CHASE…it’s “YOU CAN CALL ME AL.”

http://youtu.be/uq-gYOrU8bA

 

2.  remember LAMONT, the son on “SANFORD AND SON?”  he was played by actor DEMOND WILSON…DEMOND turns 65 years olds today…..

here’s the “SANFORD AND SON” theme, in case you forgot it…

http://youtu.be/1WqazleR3FE

here’s the birthday boy, DEMOND WILSON, with his on-screen papa, FRED SANFORD, played by REDD FOXX….

DEMOND WILSON is heavily involved in religion today…in fact, he’s an ORDAINED MINISTER!!!  here he is today on his 65th birthday….

 

4.  well, it’s off to NORTH PLATTE, NEBRASKA today…i will be officiating a wedding this weekend….my beautiful wife JEANNIE AND I are taking off today and coming back on sunday….

here’s a funny story…when i went to COLORADO in june, i stayed in NORTH PLATTE on the way down, and on the way back…it was around the halfway point….while i was staying there on the way home, i facebooked that i was stuck in NORTH PLATTE….all of a sudden, some friends of ours facebooked me and said, “HEY, ARE YOU IN NORTH PLATTE?  WE LIVE IN NORTH PLATTE.”  i had completely forgotten that they were there….so, we had breakfast the next morning before i left, and then later on they called to see if i could do their daughter’s wedding…pretty cool stuff….

5.  i feel like MARLIN PERKINS from “WILD KINGDOM.”  remember him? 

i feel like him, because it seems like every time i head to HECLA AND HOUGHTON, or am coming home from there, i see different animals….skunks, deer, turkeys, eagles, rats, muskrats, coyotes….pretty amazing…one day soon, i’m expecting to see a giraffe, possibly…..

6.  we ate pizzas last night at confirmation that had thawed out in a freezer and were refrozen a few hours later….not so good….they didn’t taste very good…i’m PRAYING that i don’t get sick…that seven hour trip to NEBRASKA would suck if i was sick…..so far, so good….

7.  MICHELLE OBAMA tried to lead a group of kids in setting a new world record for the most people doing jumping jacks, and she nearly got trampled to death…but what do you expect?  they were AMERICAN KIDS…which meant they were each probably over 300 pounds….

8.  ST. MARY’S, GEORGIA officials want to save money by replacing two firefighters at every fire station with two prison inmates….good idea….give convicted felons a fast-moving vehicle and an ax…WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG WITH THAT?

9.  P. DIDDY has published a 248 page coffee table book of photos of famous female “rear ends.”  yep….now, it sounds like a long book, but keep in mind that 200 of the pages are just a fold-out of JENNIFER LOPEZ’S tushie….

10.  TONY BENNETT says while he was on the set for a VANITY FAIR photo shoot, he accidentally walked in on LADY GAGA when she was naked….but, in his support, he WAS in the men’s bathroom….

11.  JACK OSBOURNE is becoming a father for the very first time….his fiancee LISA STELLY is expecting…..the couple said they are planning a “natural childbirth.”  his papa, OZZY OSBOURNE is asking if he can take the anesthesia instead…..

12.  JOHN LENNON’S wife YOKO ONO, if launching a global effort to fight hunger…..and, obviously, tone deafness….

13.  JOKE OF THE DAY…

(AN AWESOME JOKE…THANKS, KYLE!!!)

A  Green Bay Packers question

 1.   Last year after the Packers / Bills game, Buffalo released quarterback Trent Edwards.

2.   During the Packers / Eagles  game, the Packers injured  Philadelphia quarterback Kevin Kolb. 

      Philadelphia   then had to play   backup quarterback Michael Vick. During a playoff game against the Eagles, the Packers injured Michael Vick and another backup was needed.

3.   After the Packers / Cowboys game,  Dallas  fired Wade Phillips and most of his staff.

4.   After the Packers / Vikings game, Minnesota  fired Brad Childress and most of his staff.

5.   Four weeks after losing to the Packers, the 49er’s coach Mike Singletary and most of his staff were fired and replaced.

6.   During the Bears Playoff game, the Packers injured Jay Cutler and backup Todd Collins, forcing the Bears to go with 3rd string quarterback Caleb Hanie.

Here’s the question…   Is it just me, or did the Packers create more jobs last year than Obama?

HAVE A GREAT THURSDAY AND A WONDERFUL WEEKEND EVERYBODY….TALK TO YA MONDAY…

JAY DEAN

 

random thoughts for wednesday october 12th, 2011

HEY, THIS MAKES GOOD SENSE!!!

 

YOUR WEDNESDAY FUNNIES!!!

 

1.  happy birthday wishes are going out today to GROWING PAINS star KIRK CAMERON…he turns 41….he, of course, played MIKE SEAVER on the hit tv show…and he was quite the pin-up boy, too…

here’s the cast of the show…

you may recognize a very young LEONARDO DICAPRIO on the far right…

here’s a current picture of the cast….

here’s a current picture of the birthday boy, KIRK CAMERON..this is with his beautiful wife CHELSEA NOBLE, who played KATE on the tv show…

 

2.  today we’re going to find out whatever happened to the cast of “GOOD TIMES.” 

here’s a cast photo of the crew back in the 70’s….

actress ESTHER ROLLE played the part of the mom, FLORIDA EVANS….yes, FLORIDA….she died in 1998 at the age of 78….

 

actor JOHN AMOS had been around for quite some time before playing the dad, JAMES EVANS, SR…..he is still acting is is now 71 years old…

the most famous character on “GOOD TIMES” was JIMMIE WALKER, who played the role of the son, J.J…..he is known for the 70’s catchphrase, “DY-NO-MITE”…..JIMMY is still performing on the comedy circuit…he is now 64 years old….

actress BERNADETTE STANIS played the role of the “hot daughter” THELMA EVANS….she is now 57….

actor RALPH CARTER played the youngest child,  MICHAEL EVANS on the tv show..he is now 50 years old…

here’s a recent picture of BERNADETTE STANIS and RALPH CARTER…

actress JANET DUBOIS played the wise-cracking neighbor WILLONA WOODS…..she is now 66 years old….

do you remember who else was on the show?  remember this little girl on “GOOD TIMES?”

it’s none other than MICHAEL’S sister, JANET JACKSON….she is, of course, a mega superstar who has had many many hit records, and tv appearances….she is now 45 years old…

one thing that JANET JACKSON doesn’t want to be remembered for, but, obviously will, is the “wardrobe malfunction” at the SUPER BOWL while performing with JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE…

 

3.  MY GOODNESS….did it rain last night where you live?  while i was coming home from HECLA, i was about 8-9 miles west of HOUGHTON heading toward highway 281, when the lightning almost blinded me…it lit up the ENTIRE area for a split second…..then when i got 2-3 miles from 281, it began to pour…in fact, i had to pull over TWICE….the rest of the time, for about 10 miles, i had to drive 20-30 miles per hour….then i get to ABERDEEN and the roads are barely wet, and on the way home to WARNER the roads were completely dry……

4.  i have NEVER EVER hit a deer with my vehicle…i sincerely hope that this year isn’t my year…so far, in the last three days, i have had to dodge TWO DEER that i could have easily hit…..by the way, i have had TWO different people tell my in the last two days, that insurance companies don’t want you to swerve around deer…they want you to hit the brakes and hit the deer……wonder if that is true…..

5.  tonight is one of my favorite nights of confirmation class in HECLA….tonight is the night we watch the movie “LUTHER.”  i just LOVE that movie…..it’s the story of MARTIN LUTHER, who, unwillingly, started the movement called LUTHERANISM….he was a catholic priest who was disgrunted with the church.  he then left the catholic faith and developed millions of followers called “LUTHERANS.”

if you haven’t seen this movie, i HIGHLY recommend it…it’s superb…and you don’t have to be LUTHERAN to enjoy it!!

 

6.  my wife and i are headed to NORTH PLATTE, NEBRASKA on thursday for a wedding…i love my wife…she told me yesterday that we’re going to have to find a place to stop to watch “THE OFFICE” on thursday night because it’s supposed to be really really good…can you tell we’re competely hooked on ‘THE OFFICE?”…ha ha

7.  an artist from BROOKLYN, plans to give birth in an art gallery as part of an exhibit….hmm…not a great day to take a school field trip to the art gallery….by the way, the super hard part is going to be the framing….

8.  officials in PARLIMENT report that LONDON’S BIG BEN clock is leaning 18 inches to the side….i told this story to a blonde friend of mine, and she said, “duh…it’s probably because one hand of the clock is longer than the other!!”

9.  a woman is suing producers of the movie “DRIVE”, for having a “misleading trailer”…she claims that the film wasn’t what she thought it would be…that’s because she thought it would be GOOD…..

10.  NBA commisioner DAVID STERN has cancelled the first two weeks of the NBA season because of the lockout….he said that players and owners are miles apart…that’s because players want help with birth control, and owners are afraid that will bankrupt them….

11.  a woman was arrested in a BALTIMORE suburb after she allegedly attacked a romantic rival in a WALMART cleaning products aisle by throwing bleach and other cleaners at her, which created fumes that sparked an evacuation….there’s good news and bad news about this story…

the bad news is that two former friends got into a public fight…

the good news is, that the floor in the WALMART has NEVER been that clean….

12.  JOKE OF THE DAY:

A plane is descending rapidly from the air, and the passengers are all scared stiff.
Suddenly a women near the front of the plane stands up and takes off her shirt. She proceeds to yell, “Is there a man on this plane that can make me feel like a REAL woman before I die?!”
She continues to yell this for about ten minutes before a man in the very back takes a stand. He proceeds to say “Yeah I can make you feel like a woman.”
He then takes off his shirt and throws it towards her and says, “Here! Iron this!”

I’M PROBABLY GOING TO PAY FOR THAT JOKE…HA HA

HAVE A GREAT WEDNESDAY EVERYBODY!!!

JAY DEAN

 

random thoughts for tuesday october 11th, 2011

TO QUOTE THE GREAT ROCK BAND LOVERBOY, “EVERYBODY’S WORKING FOR THE WEEKEND.”  I JUST WANT TO WORK LIKE HOMER SIMPSON….

 

YOUR TUESDAY FUNNIES…

 

IS IT WRONG TO WISH THIS ON SOMEONE?

 

1.  i will start out today’s blog with some very creative halloween yard ideas…..we’re thinking about carving pumpkins…to heck with that!!!  we’ll just use them for some of these….

 

2.  i can’t believe this….DARYL HALL, from the supergroup “HALL AND OATES” is turning 65 today!!!  SIXTY FIVE!!!  he’s only two years younger than my parents!!!  here’s a couple of pictures of when he was much younger…

 

and here’s a current picture of HALL AND OATES…they are still touring, and i have never seen them in concert…but i would LOVE to…..by the way, as i mentioned DARYL HALL is 65 today…..just thought i’d let you know that his musical partner JOHN OATES is 62….

 

3.  OH WHAT THE HECK…let’s give you some “HALL AND OATES” music…

here’s “KISS ON MY LIST.”

http://youtu.be/CtCcFE8m8ds

and here’s “MANEATER.”

http://youtu.be/yRYFKcMa_Ek

 

4.  here’s another hard to believe fact….”SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE” is 36 years old today…that’s right, 36 years ago today, back in 1975, “SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE” made it’s debut, and is still going strong today…do you remember the original cast?

 

here’s a video of the cast from 1975-1980…see how many you can remember…

http://youtu.be/iW2t2FkWXSQ

 

5.  HOW ABOUT THOSE DETROIT LIONS?  the LIONS are 5-0 for the first time since like 1957, as they beat the CHICAGO BEARS in monday night football last night…….i do believe they are for real…i sincerely hope that the LIONS and the GREEN BAY PACKERS both stay undefeated until THANKSGIVING…why?  because GREEN BAY is at DETROIT in the turkey day game…wouldn’t that be AWESOME?

6.  last night JEANNIE AND I watched one of my favorite movies of all time…

WHAT A CLASSIC….KATHARINE HEPBURN, HENRY FONDA, JANE FONDA, DABNEY COLEMAN…an incredible cast in an incredible movie….

by the way, years ago, i was on a boat tour of the lake where the movie was filmed…we saw the house where the movie was filmed…we couldn’t go in there, because people actually lived there….

and this suprised me….JEANNIE had never seen the movie…she said she saw bits and pieces, but had never watched the entire movie until last night…by the way, SHE LOVED IT….

7.  remember the guy who was called “JOE THE PLUMBER?”  well, he’s running for congress…..which makes sense, because we SHOULD send a plumber to congress, because they are all so full of crap!!!

8.  a woman in MINNETONKA, MINNESOTA, allegedly held a UPS driver at gunpoint because he delivered a package to her home ONE HOUR LATE….let me guess….A CASE OF MIDOL?

9.  ROSIE O’DONNELL returned to television last night on the OWN network with actor RUSSELL BRAND as her first guest….ROSIE told RUSSELL how much she like his comedy, and especially how much she liked his wife KATY PERRY’S song about kissing a girl….

10.  JOKE OF THE DAY:

A man had six children and was very proud of his achievement.
He was so proud of himself that he started calling his wife, ‘Mother of Six’, in spite of her objections.
One night they went to a party. He decided that it was time to go home, and wanted to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well.
He shouted at the top of his voice,”Shall we go home, Mother of Six?”
His wife, irritated by her husband’s lack of discretion shouted back, “Anytime you’re ready, Father of Four!”

 

HAVE A TERRIFIC TUESDAY EVERYBODY…

JAY DEAN

 

random thoughts for monday october 10th, 2011

HAPPY MONDAY EVERYBODY!!

LOOKS LIKE CATS KNOW EVERYTHING…EXCEPT THEY ARE A DAY LATE!!!

YOUR MONDAY FUNNIES!!! AND MORE CATS…

1.  it’s a milestone birthday today for actor PETER COYOTE…he turns 70 today…you may remember him from such classics as “E.T. THE EXTRA TERRESTRIAL.”  he played one of the government guys….

here’s a photo of the E.T. cast recently with STEVEN SPIELBERG….PETER COYOTE is in the upper right….

and here’s PETER COYOTE today on his 70th birthday…

2.  everybody remembers this tv theme…

http://youtu.be/mjdRgBAY278

today we are going to find out whatever happened to the cast of “BONANZA.”

here’s an early cast photo of the gang….

they are from left to right, PERNELL ROBERTS, MICHAEL LANDON, LORNE GREENE, AND DAN BLOCKER…

we will start out with the dad, BEN CARTWRIGHT, played by actor LORNE GREENE….after “BONANZA”,  he went on to star in “BATTLESTAR GALACTICA”….LORNE GREENE died of complications from prostrate cancer on september 11th, 1987 at the age of 72…here is his gravesite, and a later picture of him…

 

actor DAN BLOCKER played “HOSS” on the tv show…he kind of added the “comedic” style to the show….HOSS real name on the show was “ERIC.”

DAN BLOCKER did a few things after BONANZA, but nothing brought him greater fame than this role.

he died following gall bladder surgery on may 13th, 1972 at the age of only 43….BONANZA was still on the air when he died…..

here is DAN BLOCKER in his early 40’s, and a picture of his gravesite…

undoubtably, the most famous of the crew was MICHAEL LANDON….after playing “LITTLE JOE”, he went on to star as PA INGALLS on “LITTLE HOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE”…

after that, he joined his “LITTLE HOUSE” co-star VICTOR FRENCH on a tv show called “HIGHWAY TO HEAVEN.”

little did MICHAEL LANDON know, but soon he would be on the “highway to heaven.”  on may 9th, 1991, he appeared on “THE TONIGHT SHOW WITH JOHNNY CARSON” to announce that he was dying of cancer….he died on july 1st, 1991 at the age of 54…..here is MICHAEL LANDON in his last few years, and a look at his grave….

the above picture is with former FIRST LADY NANCY REAGAN…

and last, but certainly not least, actor PERNELL ROBERTS played the son ADAM CARTWRIGHT on the show…

he went on to play the role of an older TRAPPER JOHN from M*A*S*H, on the tv show ‘TRAPPER JOHN M.D.”….

PERNELL is the most recent to die from the show…he passed away on january 24th, 2010 at the age of 81…here he is in his later years, and here’s a look at his very modest gravesite….

 

3.  if you were at the GYPSY DAY parade in ABERDEEN on saturday, and you saw a fat flash of light come by you, that was ME….ha ha…i was 3-4 blocks behind my radio stations vehicles at all times….you know how i love to talk to people……i actually RAN most of the parade instead of walking it…..no wonder my legs hurt so bad on sunday….VAUGHN KARY said that he was awfully sore on saturday as well…

4.  i put a poll on the daily blog, right before this blog…i encourage you to go check it out….it asks the question as to how old you think kids need to be to register for FACEBOOK…i’m curious to see what you think….

5.  i was completely EXHAUSTED yesterday…i had a wedding on saturday, (congrats BROCK AND LACY), plus rehearsal friday night, the reception on saturday night, a sermon to write, and two church services on sunday….i was out cold on the couch for awhile watching football yesterday…….

6.  speaking of weddings, i have the honor of doing a wedding in NORTH PLATTE, NEBRASKA this coming weekend….(we’re coming to see you AMANDA AND MIKE)…my beautiful wife JEANNIE AND I haven’t gone anywhere together for weeks, if not months…so, we’re talking off on thursday for the seven hour trip, so we can spend a day and a half with each other….relaxing, swimming, and site seeing…..should be fun!!!

7.  i’m pretty proud of my WARNER MONARCHS girls volleyball team….the number one MONARCHS played number two PARKER on saturday night and beat them three games to none……this was PARKER’S first defeat…the MONARCHS beat them in game one 25-6….WAY TO GO LADY MONARCHS…this is one really good volleyball team, by the way…

8.  officials say that sanitation conditions are becoming a concern for WALL STREET protesters in NEW YORK….or, that smell could possibly be coming from ALEX RODRIGUEZ’S playoff batting average for the YANKEES….

9.  NESTLE PURINA has developed the first tv commercial that appeals to only DOGS….yep….great, i get to watch 30 straight seconds of dogs sniffing each others butts….

10.  an 18 year old girl from MINNESOTA, admitted to breaking into her neighbor’s home THREE TIMES to steal money to feed her addiction to PORN….hmm…she apparently doesn’t have the internet….

11.  this is true…a FLORIDA car dealership has started taking HORSES in for trade-ins…..i guess it started with a total misunderstanding…the customer came in the store and told the goofy salesman that he wanted to buy a three year old MUSTANG…

12.  PAUL MCCARTNEY was married over the weekend…AGAIN….but, this wedding was a mellow affair….his last wedding was such a huge party, and the bride drank like she had a hollow leg….the food and drink cost so much in that wedding that is cost PAUL an arm and a leg…well, at least a leg….

13.  three whales have gotten off course and wandered up a river in ALASKA…they’re about as lost as MICHELLE BACHMANN’S presidential campaign…

14.  FORBES magazine has named DETROIT as “AMERICA’S MOST DANGEROUS CITY.”  which explains the new CHRYSLER warranty…it covers 10 year, or 100,000 miles, or 10 carjackings…

15.  JOKE OF THE DAY:

 A cop pulls over a carload of nuns. He says, “Sister, this is a 65 MPH highway, why are you going so slow?”
    She replies, “Sir, I saw a lot of signs that said 22, not 65.”
    The cop is surprised. “Oh sister, that’s not the speed limit, that’s the name of the highway you’re on!”
    The nun shakes her head. “Oh! Silly me! Thanks for letting me know. I’ll be more careful.”
    At this point, the cop looks in the backseat where the other nuns are shaking and trembling.
    “Excuse me, Sister,” he asks, “what’s wrong with your friends back there? They’re shaking something terrible.”
    She replies, “I don’t know. She’s been like that ever since we got off highway 119.”

HAVE A TREMENDOUS MONDAY EVERYBODY…

JAY DEAN

 

random thoughts for FRIDAY october 7th, 2011

YAY…IT’S HERE….

HERE ARE YOU FRIDAY FUNNIES!!!!!!!!!!!!

1.  this is hard to believe…JOHN “COUGAR” MELLENCAMP turns 60 today…SIXTY!!!  my goodness, all of my rockers are getting older…ha ha….

let’s check out JOHN MELLENCAMP, back when he was JOHN COUGAR…you’re not supposed to call him “COUGAR” anymore…man, i think everybody had these albums….

he’s definetly one guy i would LOVE to see in concert…here’s JOHN MELLENCAMP today on his 60th birthday….

2.  i supposed that i had better feature a video of JOHN “COUGAR” MELLENCAMP for his 60th birthday…this just happens to be my favorite song of his, “I NEED A LOVER.”

http://youtu.be/sdl5_3HX8bU

here’s one of his forgotten songs…”AIN’T EVEN DONE WITH THE NIGHT.”

http://youtu.be/DagIivbPlCU

3.  actor CHARLES NAPIER died wednesday at the age of 75 in BAKERSFIELD, CALIFORNIA….don’t know the name? you’ll know him….CHARLES NAPIER has appeared in dozens and dozens of movies and tv shows….he was in the movie “THE BLUES BROTHERS.” 

CHARLES NAPIER was the military intelligence officer who matched wits with SYLVESTER STALLONE in the “RAMBO” movies…he continued to work in HOLLYWOOD until shortly before his death…

here’s CHARLES NAPIER in his later years…

4.  “JANE,  STOP THIS CRAZY THING?” remember that line from “THE JETSONS?”

GEORGE JETSON was stuck on his treadmill and needed his wife’s help…while ASTRO and the cat stood there watching him…ha ha…i was thinking about how funny that was as i was walking on a treadmill this morning at ANYTIME FITNESS…as i giggled, i stumbled, and just about fell off the back of the treadmill…..it’s funny how life imitates art…….

5.  “HOME IMPROVEMENT” was on the tv at ANYTIME FITNESS this morning…i wasn’t watching it, as i was listening to great classic country like JIM REEVES, FARON YOUNG, PATSY CLINE and more….love love love that music…

anyway, WILSON, the neighbor was on the show and was also on a treadmill….and the computer of the treadmill was covering his face….remember?  you never got to see his face…

well, i’m about to show you him….WILSON was played by actor EARL HINDMAN…..unfortunately EARL died in 2003 at the age of 61 of lung cancer due to a lifetime of smoking….here’s EARL HINDMAN with the cast of “HOME IMPROVEMENT.”

EARL is the one on the far left….

6.  ONLY IN SOUTH DAKOTA….

this is funny….yesterday i was pulling into WARNER and noticed that the fire department was out AGAIN….i so so so respect those guys and girls who do that job…i did it for a few years and loved it….

anyway, out in the parking lot were all the vehicles of the people that came to help out with the fire….there was a pickup, a four wheeler, another pickup, another pickup, a car, another pickup, and then….

A COMBINE….

yep….someone drove a combine to the fire station in WARNER and parked it in the parking lot…i giggled all the way home….

do whatever it takes to get to the fire, right?

7.  OKAY…THAT’S ENOUGH WIND!!!!!!!!!

no disrespect to my neighbors in WARNER, but i had really hoped that all of my leaves had blown into everyone else’s yard….no such luck….apparently leaves have a bit of trouble getting thru a fence….

8.  POLICE in DES MOINES, IOWA, arrested two burlesque dancers after their pasties fell off and exposed their breasts….I’M SURE THE MEN WERE OFFENDED…by the way, busting a burlesque show for showing their breasts is kind of like shutting down the movie “DOLPHIN TALE” because the dolphin showed it’s tail….

9.  the NBA has cancelled all preseason games…which means the most successful start to a MINNESOTA TIMBERWOLVES season in their team history!!!

10.  TIGER WOODS has gotten his first endorsement deal since his infidelity scandal…the golfer has signed a deal with ROLEX…that’s because ROLEX officials heard him in a room with two girls when he said, “I JUST WANNA WATCH.”

11.  tributes are still flooding in after the death of STEVE JOBS…and in typical fashion, MICHELLE BACHMANN wished him a happy birthday…

12.  JOKE OF THE DAY:

After a particularly poor game of golf, a popular club member skipped the clubhouse and started to go home. As he was walking to the parking lot to get his car, a policeman stopped him and asked, “Did you tee off on the sixteenth hole about twenty minutes ago?”
    “Yes,” the golfer responded.
    “Did you happen to hook your ball so that it went over the trees and off the course?”
    “Yes, I did. How did you know?” he asked.
    “Well,” said the police officer very seriously, “Your ball flew out onto the highway and crashed through a driver’s windshield. The car went out of control, crashing into five other cars and a fire truck. The fire truck couldn’t make it to the fire, and the building burned down. So, what are you going to do about it?”
    The golfer thought it over carefully and responded: “I think I’ll close my stance a little bit, tighten my grip and lower my right thumb.

HAVE A GLORIOUS WEEKEND EVERYBODY…

JAY DEAN