random thoughts for wednesday december 28th, 2011

HAPPY WEDNESDAY…MAN, I LOVE THESE SHORT WEEKS…

your daily blog is brought to you by FLOORMAX in ABERDEEN…you won’t believe the inventory when you head into the store….it’s amazing…

see FLOORMAX in the auto plaza, north highway 281 in ABERDEEN….

 

here come your wednesday funnies….

yep, some of us feel like this by the end of the year!!

 

1.  happy birthday wishes are going out to actor MARTIN MILNER who has a milestone birthday today…he turns 80….you might remember MARTIN MILNER from “ROUTE 66”, but he is best known for “ADAM 12.”

here he is with co-star KENT MCCORD….

here’s MARTIN MILNER today at 80….

his partner on the streets of “ADAM 12”, KENT MCCORD is featured below as he looks today…he is now 69….

 

2.  LT. UHURA from “STAR TREK” is pushing 80…she turns 79 today….

her name is NICHELLE NICHOLS, and i found out something today that i didn’t know…before she became an actress, she was a singer with DUKE ELLINGTON and LIONEL HAMPTON…

***also, NICHELLE was one of the first black women to have a major role in a television series….

here’s NICHELLE NICHOLS today at 79…..

 

3.  i received a big suprise on CHRISTMAS EVE….we always open our gifts that night, and i knew that i was getting a small tv for the bedroom….

however, i had another gift that i was sure was a DVD…i thought it was of the tv show “OUTSOURCED”, which was on last season…JEANNIE AND I loved that show….

but, i was wrong…and i was THRILLED to be wrong….what did i get?

that’s right, one of my favorite guys in the world…DEAN MARTIN…he is by far the “king of cool”, and one of the best singers and entertainers of all time….

so far i have watched performances by LIBERACE, DEAN MARTIN, BOB HOPE and others…it’s so fun to watch some of the big stars that are no longer with us…..MY WIFE AND KIDS ARE SO AWESOME…

4.  i’m not making any new year’s resolutions this year….i break them right away anyway….oh wait, i will make one…

“I VOW TO NOT USE COCAINE THIS YEAR.”

there…one resolution i cannot break….

5.  brown county emergency management director SCOTT MEINTS is a friend of mine…he is such a nice nice guy….and the poor guy has been, i’m sure, incredibly busy this year with the number of fires around the area….SCOTT is probably the only person in the area PRAYING FOR SNOW… ha ha…

6.  my wife and i cannot believe how dirty “TWO AND A HALF MEN” has become…JEANNIE said that “MIKE AND MOLLY” has done the same thing….we’re not prudes, but it just seems ridiculous to have that kind of language in PRIME TIME…somewhere JACK BENNY and LUCILLE BALL are spinning in their graves…

7.  widespread obesity has become a problem for weight limits on ferries….water travel has become scary….some passengers fear they’ll run into icebergs, while others fear they’ll run into iceberg lettuce…

8.  a new trend in funeral arrangements is putting a QR code on headstones so visitors can scan it and see pictures of the deceased…many years down the road, the most popular gravesites will be ANTHONY WEINER AND BRETT FAVRE…

9.  DAVID LEE ROTH is joining his former bandmates in VAN HALEN for a 2012 new album and a tour….their website says that tickets go onsale january 10th…which means that DAVID LEE will have a meltdown on january 11th and the tour will be cancelled….

10.  SINEAD O’CONNOR’S fourth marriage ended last week after only SIXTEEN DAYS…..they’re already in a custody battle over the unexpired milk…

***uh-huh…now it makes sense that at the wedding people threw minute rice…..

***and by the way, after this announcement KIM KARDASHIAN said that her marriage now seemed like 25 years….

11.  reports say that MARIA SHRIVER may be rethinking her divorce to ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER…apparently after opening gifts at CHRISTMAS, MARIA was picking up wrapping paper, and you know that cleaning ladies make ARNOLD hot….

12.  MATTHEW MCCONAUGHEY is engage..the wedding will be black tie…shirt optional…

13.  JOKE OF THE DAY:

  A guy comes home completely drunk one night. He lurches through the door and is met by his scowling wife, who is most definitely not happy.
     “Where the hell have you been all night?” she demands.
     “At this fantastic new bar,” he says. “The Golden Saloon. Everything there is golden. It’s got huge golden doors, a golden floor, the works – heck, even the urinal’s gold!”
     The wife still doesn’t believe his story, and the next day checks the phone book, finding a place across town called the Golden Saloon. She calls up the place to check her husband’s story.
     “Is this the Golden Saloon?” she asks when the bartender answers the phone.
     “Yes it is,” the bartender answers.
     “Do you have huge golden doors?”
     “Sure do.”
     “Do you have golden floors?”
     “Most certainly do.”
     “What about golden urinals?”
     There’s a long pause, then the woman hears the bartender yelling, “Hey, Duke, I think I got a lead on the guy who peed in your saxophone last night!”

HAVE A TERRIFIC WEDNESDAY EVERYBODY…

JAY DEAN


 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s