OH YEAH!!!!!!!!! I’M SO READY!!!!
your favorite blog is sponsored by PIERSON FORD IN ABERDEEN….well, I’ve been letting you know little by little about our big event…and here goes….
“IT’S THE MEGA SALE”…..this coming Monday thru the end of the month, PIERSON FORD is doing some incredibly cool and incredibly fun stuff…….we will be having inflatables for the kids one day…..days of free food…….INCREDIBLE PRICES…INCREDIBLE RATES…….and it all starts Monday…it’s in conjunction with our friends at HEALTHCARE PLUS FEDERAL CREDIT UNION IN ABERDEEN…..this is going to be a huge event….
***AN EVENT LIKE THIS HAS NEVER BEEN TRIED IN THIS AREA….we’re going to have a blast with it…..
***be watching the blog Monday for more details…..
1. HERE COMES YOUR FUNNIES….
I hope somebody brought toilet paper…..
I’ve said it before, i’ll say it again…PLEASE DON’T EVER LET ME GO THRU A DIVORCE…..
I never thought that I had O.C.D…..but apparently I do, because this next thing would drive me BONKERS….
I know a few women that fit under this next category…..SHOULD I NAME NAMES?
I COULD SO CONQUER THE NEXT ONE….BRING IT ON, BABY!!!!!!!!!!
2. did you see what happened to an ESPN camera yesterday during a televised golf tourney? golfer THOMAS BJORN made an incredible shot…or was it….
that camera, by the way, is valued at $80,000….EIGHTY THOUSAND DOLLARS…..wow…..
3. speaking of ESPN, I tried to watch the “EPSY’S” award show the other night, but every time they mentioned or showed LEBRON JAMES in his incredibly ugly suit, I had to change channels….especially when he won awards……
to each his own, but i’m just not a fan…not a fan at all…..
4. happy birthday wishes are going out on Saturday to KIM CARNES….this raspy voiced young lady turns 68 on Saturday…..you probably remember and some of her big hits…….
my favorite song by her is when she did a duet with GENE COTTON…..
plus, she did another number one duet that you might know…..
and, of course, everybody knows the song that made KIM CARNES a superstar….a 1981 classic…..
if you bought KIM CARNES music, chances are you had one of the following albums…..
here’s KIM CARNES today on the eve of birthday number 68….including one with KENNY ROGERS…..(is there any chance he has had plastic surgery?….WOW)
5. alright, let’s play some KIM CARNES music….
CRANK IT UP for this 1978 hit…..my favorite song by her….the beautiful duet with GENE COTTON…”YOU’RE A PART OF ME.”
here’s another number one duet with KENNY ROGERS….good tune…”DONT FALL IN LOVE WITH A DREAMER.”
and how could we possibly do a tribute to KIM CARNES without “BETTE DAVIS EYES.”
6. on sunday, YUSUF ISLAM turns 65…..what’s that? don’t know the name…oh yes you do…he used to be called CAT STEVENS…..he converted to islam later in life……CAT STEVENS had some tremendous music in the 70’s……
here’s CAT STEVENS…I mean, YUSUF ISLAM today at 65……
7. NUMMY….CAT STEVENS had some really good music in the 70’s….let’s play them…..
here’s the classic “MORNING HAS BROKEN.”
how about “MOONSHADOW.”
and finally, “WILD WORLD.”
8. in our category called “WHOOPSIE DAISY”, we have the following story……..a crew was sent in to demolish a house and you guessed it…DEMOLISHED THE WRONG HOUSE….wow….city officials in FORT WORTH, TEXAS are already working with the owner of the home to see what it was worth so they can compensate him…GEE, YA THINK? the couple were away for awhile, turned the electricity off and left…they came home to AN EMPTY SLAB….imagine that? crews went to the wrong address……
“umm…honey? isn’t this where we left our house?”
9. here’s something rather cool….a baseball team from PELLA, IOWA had just suffered a season ending 7-1 defeat…a crushing defeat….so, after the game they head to the local BURGER KING to eat away their sorrows, when they run into none other than…JIM CARREY…..yes, the comedian JIM CARREY….they’re not quite sure what JIM CARREY was doing in IOWA, but he was there…so, he graciously went back on their team bus and took a picture with the guys….JIM is kind enough to be holding up seven fingers for the seven runs the other team scored against this team…ha ha…..
10. JOKE OF THE DAY: “AND THEN THE FIGHT STARTED.”
… She didn’t even look at me this time, simply saying, ‘Yes..’ So I said, “Then I’d like to phone a friend.”
And that’s when the fight started…
I took my wife to a restaurant.
The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.
“I’ll have the rump steak, rare, please.” He said, “Aren’t you worried about the mad cow?” “Nah, she can order for herself.”
And that’s when the fight started…..
My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table.
I asked her, “Do you know him?” “Yes”, she sighed, “He’s my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn’t been sober since.”
“My God!” I said, “Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?”
And then the fight started…
When our lawn mower broke and wouldn’t run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed.
But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the shed, the boat,
making beer.. Always something more important to me.
Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point.
When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing
scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into
the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again
I handed her a toothbrush.
I said, “When you finish cutting the
grass, you might as well sweep the driveway.”
The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.
My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, “What’s on TV?”
I said, “Dust.”
And then the fight started…
My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.
She was not happy with what she saw and said to me,
“I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you
to pay me a compliment.’
I replied, “Your eyesight’s damn near perfect.”
And then the fight started……..
I rear-ended a car this morning…the start of a REALLY bad day!
The driver got out of the other car, and he was a DWARF!!
He looked up at me and said ‘I am NOT Happy!’
So I said, ‘Well, which one ARE you then?’
That’s how the fight started.
One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot
as a Christmas gift…
The next year, I didn’t buy her a gift.
When she asked me why, I replied,
“Well, you still haven’t used the gift I bought you last year!”